Realistic, grounded people policies required

People friendly policies

Let’s say you are the head of the family – both father and husband. You have three children.

You set a family policy that your eldest son will not be pampered and that he has to be brought up to be responsible, independent and self-supportive. So all through his childhood you give him less and you keep reminding him that he is not entitled as much as the other two children.

The middle child gets moderate help from you but the youngest gets pampered and his entire needs are always fulfilled. You reason with your other children that since he is the youngest, he is entitled to your best attention and to much of your wealth.

First, you must realise that your children will consciously compare the attention you are giving to each of them. They will also see how much of each of their needs are fulfilled.

For a certainty, the eldest will feel and know that he is the most deprived and would have already formed a mindset of not being dependent on you as he grows older. He will develop a sense of insecurity of his future but this sense of insecurity will probably spur him to creatively plan for independent self-sustenance.

He will work harder, study harder and probably try very hard to excel in his career to secure financial independence.

On the other hand, because of your pampering, over-protection and fulfilment of your youngest son’s every need, the baby of the family will develop a sense of entitlement.

He will always look towards you to satisfy his every need in life and as he grows older, he will expect life owes him a living. He never had to worry while growing up and therefore he has never developed the skill to worry about his future.

Protection from the reality of life for years has never allowed him to see the need to be creative to solve his problems.

As a child, he looks to you to solve his problems. As he grows older, he expects everyone else and life to solve his problems. If his problems are not solved it is life’s fault, not his.

If his eldest brother is doing well and not helping him out financially, his brother is seen as greedy and selfish. He does not see himself as lazy because he never had to work for his needs when growing up. He was systematically ingrained with the mindset of entitlement and not the mindset of working for what he needs.

The poor youngest child grows up into an adult seen as spoilt, incapable, lazy, uncreative and forever expecting handouts. And he does not understand why others perceive him negatively because that has been his life all the while.

Matters become worse for him when he not only does not understand this simple fact, but engages in some delusional excuses and fantasies to make himself feel better.

Now take this family equation to that of the government and its people.

If a government does not undertake this basic biological and psychological fact of human nature, how can it claim to govern the people in their interest?

Think about it.

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